I am stupid

I mean that pretty much goes without saying but while in maine this past weekend I thought I was some kind of daredevil and decided to try out the rope swing on horseshoe lake. and like my mother said, michelle you're not a kid anymore only kids go on rope swings, well the rope swing fucked me up! from what I've been told, because you know alcohol was involved in this decision, I slid down the rope swing instead of letting go, hitting every knot on the rope. I have two purple fingers and a green pinkie. they're not broke but they might as well be because this means I can't hold a goddamn weight in either hand. typing this is killing me. everytime I hit the enter or shift key I get shock through my right hand. I am some kind of piece of work.

two words

size matters

random hate

thought I'd jump on the random friday thoughts, but of course mine is going to be random hates in no particular order:

-people who get on the train before the people who need to get off actually get off the train. what the fuck people! the train is going nowhere until the people are off and you are on, what kind of rush are you in that you need to plow past everyone, just to get on? where are you going that's so important. maybe I need to go there too to see how great it is. I know for goddamn sure nobody is that excited to get to work in the morning, so calm the fuck down.

-skinny ass bitches weighing themselves at the gym. I'm not even gonna bitch about it, that line says it all.

-tony's new program for me. are you fucking serious tony??? what have I done in the past to lead you to believe I can do 80 pushups? I'm gonna be at the gym all goddamn night on that day.

-to the fat chick who works in the office at my gym, this is why i hate you: you are a fat bitch. everytime I see her I actually smile. because she's fat and I'm not. how in gods good name do you stay that fat working at a gym? when I worked there I was working out every goddamn day. if for no other reason than I hated my job and I needed to get away from my desk. but still, I was making an effort.

-the hot dude that I have a big crush on at scla. yes, I am that girl in this situation. I don't hate him so he shouldn't be on this list but he was in a suit and tie and glasses on the elevator and thats really all I can think of right now, so that's why he's here

-my asshole downstairs neighbor who doesn't have the balls to come out and say something to me about not closing the gate behind me when I come into the yard. I mean if I were her, I wouldn't have the balls to say anything to me either, but I'm just stating she's a pussy.

-per suggestion I am deleting this line. but just know that I hate loud typers and talkers

-pete who told me I suck earlier in the week. don't like you right now and you are not getting cupcakes tomorrow.

-my boss at emma's. who's just an ass and pissed me off last night.

ok, that's it for now. I have a date I gotta get ready for and need to de-hate so I don't scare him away.

hate free

is the way I be tonight. shocking, I know. but in six days my brother leaves for boot camp for the navy. and I can honestly say that I am heartbroken. I think in the long run that it will be the best thing for him. but right now I just can't get past the fact that my little brother is leaving us, for a long time. so instead of being angry, I'm just sad.

not one, but two

fucking benches stolen on me tonight at scla. fine, I can understand the first one, I only had my weights next to it, nothing else, but the second one I specifically asked this dude if he was using it and the weights that I was using to begin with. no he says. so I do my set of neutral grip incline db presses. I go to do my pull ups and next thing I know, the fucking dude's buddy is on my bench. common courtesy says that the guy I asked if he was using it should have told his friend that I was. oh, silly me, we're at scla. forgot for a minute. I understand how the gym works, if you walk away from a machine, it's free game. but this was not the only bench around! maybe I am asking too much for someone to have the courtesy to say someone's using that. dickhead.
and there was a girl doing db shoulder presses (pretty sure that's what they're called) while on the stationary bike. what is going on in the world that this stuff is acceptable.

why?

this is going to be short and obviously not so sweet.
I've been noticing this guy on one of the spin bikes (not in class tony) riding along, but while doing so, also hold like 20 pound dumbells doing something like flys while he's pedaling. it's not exactly flys, it looks like he's doing the no money drill but with dumbells. why is he doing this? it hurts my head to see him doing it. in any case, he looks like an asshole and as I walked by him tonight I just shook my head at him. which if you know the story with me, that's almost the worst thing you can do to me, call me whatever name you want, but shake your head in disgust and that might be the last time your head shakes like that. and trust me CP staff, you do it on saturday, I will hurt all of you. I can bet brian will be the only one to even try it, knowing he's my "fav" and thinking I won't hurt him. I'll still punch him, don't worry

pregnant people make me nauseous

this is probably the only time I'm going to apologize for my personal views, mostly because I know some of my readers have kids, so I'm sorry for the forthcoming rant. but really, pregnant people make me nauseous. I have known since I've been ten that I dont' want kids. I don't understand why anyone wants children honestly. they grow up to be fuckers. this all stems from a lady at the gym last night who not only was wearing big ass sunglasses in the weight area, who not only had on flip flops, who not only was doing some ridiculous move with 5 lb dumbells, but was doing all this wearing a tight ass tank top and was atleast 8 months pregnant. I'd almost forgive all the ridiculous shit she was doing if she just had a normal t-shirt on, but no a tank top was what she felt like wearing. if I was a normal, child loving person I'd say, yay for you! you're pregnant! but I'd still say, put some fucking clothes on. because nobody wants to see that shit.
again, sorry to all the children loving/having people. dont' mean to offend you guys, because I actually like you. the rest of the world, I hate.

crackheads, crutches and cockroaches

yea, I said cockroaches bitches! no lie, I leave the gym tonight and get on the redline at park street and see this guy in front of my hop to the right so I look down and there's a cockroach the length of my palm scurrying along the ground. no shit. I'm so not girly but I HATE bugs. so I immediately screech like a little girl and run for my life. I'm still fucking itchy and freaked out. I'm going to be having dreams about that fucker tonight. christ.

I'm totally going backwards here. so before I get on the redline I have to walk through boston common, which is crackhead central. there's a c.h. chick walking towards me muttering about how she's going to snap. so I steer clear of her and right behind her I find out why she's going to snap. another c.h. whining, but why didn't you tell me donna. over and over again. and then the bitch ended up at the harvard stop with me. I don't know how that happened because she wasn't moving fast enough to get to the train in time. I am cursed I tell you.
I hate crackheads. sweet baby jesus do I hate crackheads.

so yea, there were two guys on crutches at the gym tonight. I've never seen anyone on crutches at the gym. ever. normally I'd say wow, they're really dedicated to their training. but this ain't cressey performance people. this is scla. and they're just assholes for being at the gym on crutches. I think someone's looking for some sympathy. and I don't have any for them

totally unrelated, but all is forgiven eric for not putting me on the powerpoint on sunday, if only because you said I was the wind beneath your wings and I personally know that cp wouldn't be the same without me. so, you know, no special thanks needed...
and pete, don't hate. because I can already hear you bitching that I let eric off too easily.

have a happy 4th everyone!!