Michelle's Blog

new?

2010-03-28T12:55:00.002-04:00

I thought of creating a new blog, with a new name and a new (?) outlook on things so I could just write down my day to day thoughts, not my day to day hate but then I thought to myself, you know you're still going to hate on everyone so why start over? and you know, I'm lazy. so maybe this won't be all about my hate of scla or people in general anymore and just my thoughts that I want to get off my chest and out of my mind without having to listen to my brother tell me he told me so. because, hey jerk! I've never once said I told you so! I may have thought it, but I didn't say it asshole. see, the hatred wasn't that far away.
anyways, I've been sick for the past week and literally been in bed as much as possible. haven't trained since last sunday and while I can't wait to get back to the gym, it's not going to happen today. today I am going to bake and catch up on some crafty things for a girl at works desk (long story about my hated job that I don't care to get into) maybe I'll finally go clean my car but I doubt it.
right now I'm waiting for my cookie dough to chill and my eggs to come to room temperature so I can make this thing called a brookie. half cookie half brownie. not rocket science here. the recipe is from this bakery called Baked in Brooklyn. I love brooklyn. I found out about this place from best thing I ever ate on the food network. I want to say it was the chocolate episode, or maybe the salty episode - that sounds more accurate actually - anyways, the five ingredients lady had one of their brownies with salted caramel in it and I wanted it. immediately. in my mouth. so the next time I went and visited chris (I have found myself having a real life boyfriend...) I told him we were going to Brooklyn and that was all I wanted for valentine's day. the boy does not listen to me so that was not all I got for v-day. regardless, I go to the bakery and am instantly in love with the place and the staff but no brownies. apparently everyone else wanted the brownie in their mouth immediately. go figure. but chris got the brookie and said it was pretty delicious (this is how he speaks, I'm not joking)so I started following this place on facebook and twitter (I'm a stalker at heart) and the owner was on martha stewart and made them. so now I will try to recreate. it's been so long that I've kept up with blogging that I'm sure nobody follows or reads anymore but if you don't know this about me, I love to bake. LOVE to bake. it's actually my form of therapy. you ever watch grey's anatomy and when denny dies and izzy keeps making muffins. that's me, when I'm sad or whatever, I bake. nobody has died lately but I'm sad and frustrated right now and I'm going to bake. I might bake for the week! I told someone at work like a year ago I'd make a root beer float cake and I think I'm going to do that next. because funny story, I just looked up the recipe on www.joythebaker.com (I'm also insane about food blogs)and guess where it comes from? BAKED! I have to make it now... though I'm not thrilled about the frosting because it's a chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and I don't' like that. maybe a whipped cream frosting? I do love homemade whipped cream. ok, I'm going to get back to it. maybe I'll post a follow up and let you know how it came

surrounded by douchebags

2010-01-20T20:06:00.003-05:00

yes I realize it's been almost a year since I've last posted but you all know what this past year has been for me. SO, I'm back. I'll try to be better, no promises though.
the reason for the return, what else besides the assholes at scla driving me insane. this was an actual conversation I just overheard in the elevator:
blondie (to two dudes): so I hurt myself tonite
dudes: oh really?
blondie: yea, hehe. bench pressing.. (shoulder shrug)

this is where my head almost shot off it's shoulders. ten minutes prior to this elevator business I witnessed this stupid ass doing head stands in the middle of the gym. so, right, you "hurt" yourself bench pressing...
there's two girls who actively bench at scla. me and natalie. and Natalie did the smart thing and left scla. I can honestly say I have never seen her bench press. any girl benching gets my attention, anywhere. she is full of shit.
there was also a dude on the stepmill barefoot. you'll remember I was "spoken" to about trap bar deadlifting barefoot.
surrounded by douchebags man..

DISCLAIMER: this is sad..

2009-05-17T22:12:00.005-04:00

I didn't realize that it's been exactly a month since my last blog post until I signed in. I've been meaning to write but I have been dreading writing this post. I've had a miserable month. a devastatingly, downright miserable month. and I haven't written about it because I didn't want to depress everyone out there. but one thing I've realized is that I have some great friends that don't mind so much listening to what I have to say, even if its depressing news. and another thing I've realized is that if you don't get the bad shit off your chest it will build and build until you have a meltdown, like I did this morning.
so about a month ago me and my family found out that my dad has 6-12 months to live, he has another brain tumor that is growing at a fairly rapid rate that is inoperable. at the same time he also has skin cancer on his nose and face and the cancer has spread into his cheek and neck. his doctors are only concerned with that cancer right now, it's the most aggressive cancer they have seen in the past 20 years. he has to get radiation five times a week for the next 6-7 weeks (now about four more weeks I'd guess) just so his nose doesn't turn black and fall off. there is nothing that can be done for him beyond purely aesthetic purposes. and if that wasn't bad enough, my dad has no idea who I am. within a week he didn't know me. I seen him on april 18th - my nana's birthday - and we had our normal conversation (which would not be normal to anyone else) about who knows what and a week later he didn't have a clue who I was. or actually, he thought I was my sister.
I'm guessing at best, the way things are going, my dad has more like 3-6 months to live. and I could go on with this story and how everyday it's something new that has gone wrong, but I think you get the picture. what I have decided is that this is not the way I will remember my dad. I will remember him as the guy who never left me, who two months ago hugged me and told me he appreciated everything that I did (which meant bringing him cookies), who picked me up drunk and crying and ready to kick someone's ass for making me cry, who told me that I was always welcome to move back home (unlike the rest of the siblings), who used to answer the phone with it's your dime and ended every phone conversation with HELLO and who used to tell stories that began with "and there I was...". this is how I'll remember him.
I also decided to send out a HUGE thank you and I love you to all my friends. this is such a shitty situation to be in but there are certain things that are getting me through the days. so, thank you carrie for listening to me constantly and not making me talk if I don't want to, or waiting for me to do it on my terms. thank you anna buckingham for saying you'd go to d.c. with me to tell my brother all this in person and rubbing my back when I cried. thank you CP for existing, because training is a huge stress reliever for me and it's honestly the one and only place I am happy these days. and a big thank you for everyone who has eaten my baked goods, it's my form of therapy and I'm happy to pawn them all off on you and not eat them myself.
and carrie, I lied. this is my favorite paul simon song. mainly because the lines: and I see losing love is like a window in your heart. everybody sees you're blown apart. everybody feels the wind blow

all time high

2009-04-17T01:09:00.005-04:00

the hate is running at an all time high tonight. it's mostly for reasons that don't concern scla, though the jumping rope guy almost got a landmine to the fucking forehead but I digress... this post is going to be dedicated to things I don't hate. because at this point in time I have to focus on those things. otherwise my head is going to explode. so, in no particular order here we go:

highland kitchen: because even though the waitress didn't bring me the right drink (twice), I know that I can go to bo and explain my drink and get what I want.
highland kitchen (again): because they make their own pickles. enough said.
(I love highland kitchen)
jason: even though he makes me absolutely bonkers crazy, he makes me laugh. and right now I need to laugh.
sling blade: because yes, even a disturbing depressing movie can be made into a comedy when jason is involved.
alison: because even though she is miles away, she still knows that wine, chocolate, baked good and most of all tequila will make me happy
chris howard: just because.
friends who remind you that they're there for you no matter what.
friends who share their sad stories with you and listen to yours and don't mind sitting in silence
steph and eric: for making "going elwell" into a verb and a blog post
all the people who donated money for my bike ride: your generosity astounds me. I love you all
my married former gym boyfriend: I know you think I'm crazy but thank you for taking the weight off the landmine for me because I was honestly too tired and out of breath to do it myself. and I refuse to not re-rack my weights. even if technically I have someone else do it.
LOST: goddamn you lost! I have no idea what's going on but I love you anyways.
tony: for making me into a gym snob and a lover of lifting heavy shit. it truly keeps me sane
the fact that my mind thinks in song. that doesn't sound right but you get what I'm saying. the song may be annoying at times and sometimes I have like songs battling it out in my head but I like that I "think" in music
and lastly, my bed: I love you bed. I hate that I have to leave you in 7 hours but I'll be back...

here I leave you with the song that has been stuck in my head all night

who needs spike when you have hate?

2009-04-07T21:02:00.002-04:00

first off I apologize for being mia lately, I honestly haven't had much of anything good to say lately. been a bit of a downer and didn't want to spread my blahness on everyone else. I did have a blog post almost written last week, all about how pallof tortured me and I was bruised and broken but I just never got into it and then I got over the fact that my legs were green.
but I don't think I'm gonna get over tonight anytime soon. I fucking hate sports club la. I hate myself for going there and paying as much as I do to deal with douchebags. and again, I know that every commercial gym is going to be bad but I don't know that it would be as bad as scla. so tonight I have to do tb dl's paired with neutral grip seated rows. then this stupid B1-B5 complex thing with little to no time to rest and I forgot my spike at work. but I tell myself that it's a deload week so I can just skip the spike this time. I KNOW! crazy right??
so I start my sets of dl's and get in one set of rows before someone jumps on the machine. annoying but whatever, I'll just wait. and THEN a trainer came over to me and said um hi, you need to put your shoes on, we have a rule about wearing shoes especially when you're around weights, and she pointed at the weights like I didn't know what they were and I must have made a face because she sort of backed up and I said I train barefoot all the time and I'll put my shoes on after I'm done deadlifting. without freaking out, I totally went elwell on her (thanks eric!!). her response was oh, really well ok they (I don't know who they were) told me to come over and tell you to put your shoes on. motherfuckers. either 1. she's lying about someone telling her to say something because she's afraid I'm gonna punch her or 2. someone was in fact too big of a pussy to say anything to me themselves. I'm going to go with a combination of both.
I am sure it has happened but how many people have dropped weights on their feet?? and do I look that retarded. god fucking help me if any of you thought well yes michelle you do look that retarded.
and what about the assholes that wear flip flops on the weight floor??? that's ok?? atleast I have socks on assholes. I hate everyone
so I am telling you that I did not need any spike to fuel my workout tonight. I had plain old hate to push me through....

stay tuned for an upcoming post on stinky people and how much I hate them. I can guarantee eric will hate me for what I write and NO eric doesn't stink...

the end of an era

2009-03-01T22:22:00.006-05:00

I used to have this friend Yolanda. I knew her since the eight grade. I was her first friend when she moved here from north carolina. one day we were lined up outside of a class waiting to go in and I seen that we both had the same shoes on. I don't even think we became friends right then, it's just my first memory of her. I don't even know how we "became" friends but we did. we were inseparable. and we stayed inseparable for almost 20 years. I don't know what happened but we're no longer friends. maybe people aren't meant to stay that close forever. maybe people grow apart. I just don't know. so I went to redbones on friday night for my friend bryce's last night of work. I think bryce worked there for 10 years. he was the first bartender I became friends with there and the first one I "followed" and because the owners have taken a new found interest in running their business after being absent for a very long time, they've decided to "ask" the one night a week employees to leave. I have been going to redbones for so long that I don't remember a time I didn't hang out there. but it's not the same as it used to be. the above picture is from redbones. me and yolanda used to go there every wednesday night after our day class at umass boston and before my night class at bentley. Joe used to bartend downstairs and at least 50% of the time, I didn't make it to my night class. anyways, me and yolanda wrote on the picture ME + YO heart JOE. we LOVED joe. I still love joe, yolanda probably not so much. I took the picture a while ago to remind me what times used to be like. the picture now has our writing painted over. it's not the same as it used to be. to me it really does feel like the end of an era.
that was the end of my week, which almost was the "straw that broke the camels back" but it didn't. here's the rest of the week, working backwards:
wednesday day and night I ran around like a maniac and finally got home at 11 pm to shitty news about a couple of people I know, people I really do think of as my friends. the news had nothing to do with me but it left me really sad. sometimes you think you know whats going on with people but you never truly know what happens in people's private lives. I'm sorry for my friends and I hope they know that I'm there for them if they need anything. because I may be a raging bitch, but I am a loyal bitch if nothing else.
went to scla on tuesday - and almost took this dudes head off when he gave me an attitude about using the box and 30 lb db's to do my step ups.
on monday we found out my dad has another brain tumor. this time on the right side of the brain, whereas the other is on the left side. so we're dealing with two brain tumors right now. they've been "watching" the left side for a while now but he's been in a lot of pain and acting crazier than usual so he went in for an emergency mri two weeks ago. we won't know until tomorrow (hopefully) what the next course of action is. but needless to say my family is in turmoil. my brother who's in dc is freaking out about not being home. my sister calls me crying about having to sell my dads car, because that's when it hit her that things will never be the same. my mom shows no emotion ever so I have no idea how she's coping. not a clue whats going on with kerri and I'm just taking it day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. I try not to think about it, but who can do that? it's always there but I am trying to push it out and not freak out or jump to conclusions about what this means.
so yea, the end of an era. that's what it feels like to me

OH MY GOD!!!!

2009-02-20T12:45:00.003-05:00

The National are coming to boston! The National are coming to boston! The National are coming to boston!
THE VOICE IS COMING TO BOSTON!!!!

I can’t even think straight right now. I’m about ready to pee my pants and probably give myself a heart attack from the shear excitement I am feeling right now. Mind you, tickets don’t go on sale until tomorrow so I am not even in yet. But the fact that they are coming here is enough to make me freak out!!! And steph is in damn PR so I have nobody to freak out with! I will have permagrin on for the rest of the day. I wish I could take a picture just to show you all that I do in fact know how to smile! and these assholes at work will not be able to get to me anymore today. Fuckers. They are trying their best today to make me snap, I’ll tell you that much. But it won’t work any longer.

who needs spike

2009-02-18T07:57:00.005-05:00

when you find out the dude you've had a crush on for the past year is married! yup, my gym bf is married. last night was the first time I ever saw a ring. I am completely bummed out. granted I never spoke to the guy and really never had any intention to but it was a really nice distraction at that asshole gym and it was something to look forward to during the day. now the dream is dead.
so yea, I went to gnc on the way to the gym to stock up on spike and they are OUT until the end of next week. but I am telling you, I don't even think I needed it after the ring incident. I tapped some serious hate and was able to keep increasing the weight on my lifts. I say that like I did anything crazy yesterday. eric took away half my program because of my back so I literally was doing flat db presses, rows and db step-ups. but they were with heavier weights!
well yesterday was a shit day hopefully today will be better... I have ice coffee to look forward to at least. I'm off to work

I forgot to mention that the new national is out!!! well, it's a compilation of a bunch of really great artists. but the national does have a new song on it. so does bon iver, who are amazing!!! get it here: http://www.darkwasthenight.com
or on itunes. I've listened to most of it and it's great!

two blogs in one night!!!

2009-02-15T22:57:00.003-05:00

like I said, I didn't want to take away from chris' post so I had to write another one. so normally every saturday I train at CP. I have a routine. I like routine. I get up, putz around for a bit. get all my shit together. go get an ice coffee and then drive out to hudson. I normally spend some time talking to everyone, change and then finally start my training that usually takes six hours. I drive back to somerville, pay the tattoo employees and then go about my night however I choose. but this weekend I trained at cp on friday night and didn't go out on saturday. I didn't know what to do with myself. all this free time! what to do, what to do??? so I did what I always do when I have time on my hands... fuck around on the computer while baking. I should have gone to scla and trained but I didn't. I just felt like relaxing, so shoot me! I now HAVE to get to scla today. not even a question, I have to get there and train. so I set my alarm for 8. hit the snooze about 9 times but then finally get up and get my ass there around 10ish. I'm so not feeling it. the vibe is all off. these wide angled neutral grip cable rows feel weird. one legged push ups just aren't happening. oh, and I didn't mention that this is all on NO SPIKE. training with no spike is not a fun time at all. one legged push ups with no spike is some kind of cruel joke played on michelle. and then I spot Natalie. and she tells me that her and aaron are going to do this 300 training. 50 pull ups, 50 deadlifts, 50 box jumps, 50 push ups, 50 crazy leg swing things while holding the barbell up and 50 clean and presses. I immediately stop feeling bad for me and my no spike self and continue on with my program. she then tells me that her and aaron have "created" a sled. now, I hate the sled at cp. I have such disdain for the sled that it's visible. I'd kick the sled if I knew I wouldn't hurt myself. but at scla, where nobody trains like me and natalie and apparently aaron (it's true, come see us train, nobody trains like us) pushing/pulling the sled brings me such joy I can hardly control myself.
so picture this: a metal step about a foot and a half high. with these sort of blast straps attached to it. then picture natalie running down a stretch of carpet, about three quarters the length of cp's turf (I don't know exactly how long it is) with aaron sitting on the step. and then picture me doing the same but with aaron's friend pete sitting on the step. and just so you get the full picture, I think aaron did it with six plates a couple of times and a couple of times with some number of plates and natalie on the step!!! now picture the looks on all the assholes at scla watching us do this. priceless man. priceless.
I can honestly say that I have NEVER enjoyed a workout at scla until today. I'm hoping this happens every sunday, because I'm there if it does.

I heart chris howard

2009-02-15T22:06:00.007-05:00

I told chris that my next blog was going to be about him and while I wanted to mention some other things that went on this week and not seem like a total stalker crazy girl, I don't want to take away from the "all about chris blog post"

so I went to portland earlier this week to contest a speeding ticket and was not so successful but I did get to spend some time in the city which was nice because I do love me some portland. I wake up on friday to a text from anna asking if I was coming to training and also find out chris is coming to town. and I'm pretty sure I screeched like a little girl when I read it. so I immediately text anna back asking if chris was coming out to the facility because I wasn't going to the seminar and I had to make sure I got to see him.

see, chris was my favorite intern at cp. which is not a title I throw around lightly. and while I did finally warm up to larrabee, and I did really like kevin neeld, christopher howard will go down as my most favorite intern EVER! he's the only one that could walk by while I was doing glute ham raises and ask (repeatedly) if we were having fun yet without me wanting to rip his face off. he once approached me while I was doing rotational medball shotputs and said, in case you want some advice, I'd do it this way. instead of a certain coach, like say BRIAN, who just yells at you across the facility about how you're doing it wrong. and chris might be the only dude to talk jeans with me and steph and have it not be condescending. so my point being, if you haven't gotten it yet is that want him to come back to hudson asap. please hurry up through massage school and come back to us!!! we miss you!! (not just me either) in the meantime, it was great to see you this weekend, at the very least come back and visit soon.

oh and in case you all don't know what chris looks like, this is him (how could you NOT love him???):

new national!!!!!!!! and other random stuff

2009-02-08T11:13:00.005-05:00

to say I like this band might be putting it lightly. I am OBSESSED with this band. they are the sole reason I want to go to brooklyn. they are the sole reason I think brooklyn is the motherland. (though I have been told I will be disappointed) they are the only thing I will listen to when getting say, my ribs tattooed. or any tattoo. this man's voice is pure heaven. it makes me want to melt. I want to marry this man. just to hear him talk or you know, sing to me. I don't care that he's a geeky little skinny dude. I just want to marry the voice.

I'm sitting here on my couch watching espn and I can't stop sneezing. I think I sneezed 30 times in a row last night and it's making me bonkers. anyways, this all brings me to my other love of the moment. lebron james. so hot. I'd like to punch tim legler in the face right now. and I hope lebron stomps on asshole kobe's face today

ok, I'm off to clean this disgusting apartment but I will leave you with this: I am in search for a t-shirt that says "will work for training time" if anyone knows where I can get said t-shirt, please let me know.

why must people fuck with me???

2009-01-28T16:59:00.000-05:00

I wish I could be the type of person that could let things go. That wouldn’t let the little things in life bother me. That wouldn’t let the assholes of the world get to me. But as many of you know, it’s mostly the little things in life that make me absolutely bonkers. I went to pick up lunches and get coffee today with my friend andrea and as we were leaving somehow andrea got ahead of me and held the door for me and granted I was like 10 feet behind her and yes it was cold and snowing but this bitch said (a little too loudly) close the door. I’m pretty sure I gave myself whiplash by snapping my head around and saying are you shitting me? To which they had no response. Now anyone else would just let it go, no big deal. I on the other hand wanted to go back to flour and stomp on that bitches face. Why didn’t I, you ask? Because I go to flour every morning for my coffee. If I got thrown out of flour I would not be able to work at my job anymore. This is how integral flour ice coffee is to my day. It is what gets me out of bed in the morning. I’m not joking. I have been late and “spoken” to at work about being late because I need to go to flour everyday more times than I can remember. One might say get up earlier, or leave your house earlier, to which I reply, read the last few lines asshole! Ice coffee is the reason I get out of bed in the morning, I obviously have bigger problems than leaving my house earlier.
I have run into problems at flour before. Last week this crazy lady kept bumping from behind and finally I snapped and said AM I IN YOUR WAY??? Very loudly. And just the other day, shit I think it might have been yesterday in fact, some lady was so anxious to see what pastries they had that she had to push in front of me and my friend Rachel and then announce that she was just looking. Like that excused her pushing us out of the way. Hey lady! The pastries aren’t going anywhere asshole!
I would go somewhere else for coffee in the morning if there was a better place, but there isn’t. and if you people think I’m gonna drink dunkin donuts, you’re crazy.

I’m off to scla now, where I’m sure to get annoyed by everyone there too. this may be a two blog posting day!

Oh before I leave, here's one for the sweet baby jesus file. There’s a tiny article in the new sports illustrated (page 23) about how this fitness club called Gymbox has replaced some metal plates with human weights. Like ACTUAL people. These “liftees” wear black leotards marked with their weights. And they are doing this because a lot of their members felt that lifting metal weights was boring. And the kicker in all this is that the human plates – that’s what the owner calls them – shout encouragement to “flesh pumping” customers.

You know I’m going to be in the middle of a goddamn squat or something and think of this and kill myself tonight

my crazy friend steph

2009-01-25T22:45:00.004-05:00

a couple weeks back this was on the quote of the week board at CP. I thought I'd take a picture just in case steph was ever needing a reminder that she did actually say it. now, the below is actually stolen from steph's blog:
"That's when the ankles started throbbing. That's when I ran INTO the headwind. That's when I got cold. That's when I started to question everything"

STEPH! STOP RUNNING!

I also miss you on saturdays. stop running and come back to lifting heavy weights with me

I'm back bitches!

2009-01-24T15:42:00.005-05:00

yes I realize it's been more than a month since I've posted a new blog and I know that you all have missed me terribly, so I apologize to all my fans, I know it's tough living a michelle free life. I will try my hardest to get back on the blogging bandwagon.
honestly I don't have anything new to report here. somehow I made will afraid of me today, (I think it was him anyways) and I thought I was on some pretty good behavior at cp today so I don't even know what I did to make him scared of me. but I will say that, as most of you know, I have no trouble you know, asking to work in on something with them, or say you know telling someone to get the fuck out of my way because I am trying to push the sled and if you don't I will run your ass over. I'm just sayin. and you know if someone isn't going to speak up for themselves, I also have no trouble doing that for them too. so, yes the rest of the girls are probably known as the quiet ones and I am the bitchy one that yells and swears. but what the fuck? someone's gotta do it.
ok, I have a birthday party to attend. but before I leave, I just want to publicly apologize to Catherine. here goes:
Catherine, I am deeply sorry for offending you with my post a while back. PLEASE come back to cp. I don't like being the only bitch there (that's a lie, I don't mind it at all). I also don't like being the only person to make fun of pete. it's so much better telling him he'd be better looking if he were a few inches taller when you are there to tell him too. think of the fun we had, mostly at pete's expense but it was fun regardless! I will await your return. hurry back!

I'm not gonna be able to walk tomorrow

2008-12-12T00:27:00.002-05:00

the first week of a new program is always brutal. I'm not sure if it's this way for everyone but it is for me. tuesday night I did some bulgarian split squats, pushups, flat db presses, pull throughs (I hate pull throughs!!!), cable rows, ab wheel roll outs and a barbell complex. overall I didn't think it was anything over the top. nothing too crazy. I've done all these things before. but not recently. everytime I had to get up from my chair yesterday I had to get some momentum going and basically jump out of the chair because otherwise the pain would have kept me sitting all day. mind you, I was at a seminar all day yesterday and in order to stay awake I had to get up and move. as a side note, an older lady at my table was astonished to know that I'd finish a gallon of water in the time we were stuck together. astonished might not be the right word actually. I think she was horrified. crazy crazy world we live in. ok back to training. so I'm having a hard time moving about yesterday and today was just as bad. so I go in to do day 2 of the program. I do some bench pressing, hip stretching, rack pulling (like I'm not in enough pain!) head supported db rowing (like I need to look like a bigger asshole!) 1 arm db pressing, side plank rowing (PAIN!) and then comes the kicker. the leg matrix: 24 squats, 12 front lunges - each leg, 12 jump lunges - each leg and 12 squat jumps. I have never done jump lunges so I asked one of the trainers walking around. I said, so I actually go into a lunge? thinking I'm just supposed to jump and sort of split my legs or whatever. so he says yea you go into the lunge and he looked at my program and said, that's why he said yes you will hate me (thanks tony!!). to which I replied, oh I hate him anyways regardless of the lunges. I don't think my legs have ever burned like they did tonight. sweet baby jesus I think I went blind from the pain. so that is why I will not be able to walk tomorrow. and you know saturday's going to be worse. I'll be rolling myself right on up into CP.

I forgot

2008-12-03T00:06:00.002-05:00

to wish anna good luck tomorrow and wednesday with her exams, though I know she'll do great.

195

2008-12-02T20:13:00.003-05:00

no, that's not what I weigh though that's what I feel like right now. tonight I had to do tb deadlift clusters. 6 sets of 4x1 and I worked up to 195. as I've stated before, I'm not the strongest girl ever but I'm impressed with myself being able to deadlift 195 lbs. I also want to say that this was done with a tattoo that's two days old that runs from my boob to my hip and hurts like hell. not to mention is all swollen. I contemplated not training today but I sucked it up and did it and I'm really happy I did. I'm off to do laundry and catch up on some tv. good night!

waiting tables

2008-12-01T23:37:00.003-05:00

just a quick post here before I go to bed. I wait tables on monday nights at a place in cambridge and I'm pretty sure I've written about some of my biggest pet peeves from customers. but just to highlight my most hated two: water with no ice, are you fucking kidding me??? why? is all I want to know. I have super sensitive teeth and actually prefer room temperature water but I will never ever ever send water back because I want no ice. and flagging the waitress down. I have personally gotten up and found my waiter or asked someone else to find them because they suck and decided to disappear on me but I will never flag someone down. I don't even like flagging cabs down. I hate that shit. its ignorant and tonight I got both. so I not only wanted to throw ice water in this dudes face, I also wanted to stab a girl in her hand. but what salvaged the night was the fighting couple. after overhearing their conversation I'm not even sure if they were a couple (he was tired of chasing her, to which she replied you've never chased me). they were so awesome and they absolutely HATED each other. which I'm sure sucked for them. but it was great for me and my manager. I'm pretty sure this is just another reason on the list of why I'll be alone forever because I take too much joy in other people's misery. just random people though, not peeps I know. other than Pete. I like making him miserable, though I'm not sure I've completely succeeded in that yet.
I don't know how the fighting started but I brought them water and they were fine, I went back to get their order and you could almost see the hate emitting from them both. and she was a complete bitch to get her order from because she didn't want to talk to him about the order which made me have to stand there while he was pulling words from her mouth. (he asked do you want mushrooms, she said whatever. whatever you want, while sighing really loud). she actually said at one point, I can't deal with your shit right now, to which I ran away and giggled. and she then put her hood of her sweatshirt on when she was done ordering. so great. it was like christmas for me. anyways, that's all. I'm off to take care of this fucking tattoo that hurts like hell and go to bed.

giving thanks

2008-11-28T23:33:00.005-05:00

yes this should have been posted yesterday but I was being lazy and just getting around to it today. I can say with certainty that the people pictured up above are the only people that could make my ass get out of bed at 6:30 am on thanksgiving morning (after getting home at 1:30) to travel 45 minutes to lift weights - notice the lack of PETE in this picture. I didn't think I'd make it out there. wednesday night is the biggest drinking night of the year, and you all know how I love to drink. but this year was different. maybe I'm getting older. maybe it was the arc trainer intervals I did earlier in the evening. whatever it was, I didn't leave the house until 10:30 and didn't drink much and I had it in the back of my mind that I HAD to make it to hudson in the a.m. because I knew I'd be missing out on something good if I didn't go.
so the alarm goes off at 6:30 and I want to roll back over and go to sleep but I get up and think please please please let me find a coffee shop open. starbucks in davis happens to be open. I order an iced americano with an extra shot, not knowing that an extra shot brings me up to 5 shots of espresso. I tell them no no no. I will have a heart attack if I have 5 shots and a spike on top of that. so you know, 4 shots and a spike 40 minutes later is just fine. I walk into CP through the back door expecting everyone to already be warming up, and there's nobody there. tony's car is there so I know I wasn't being fooled into thinking there's a training session happening - not that training at 8 am on thanksgiving is EVER a joking matter - so I go to the bathroom and come back to a full house. steph did not believe I'd be in (who could blame her) and everyone else could have cared less.
everyone who reads this blog knows how yesterday went - except PETE because he wasn't there - so I'm not gonna repeat the story. suffice it to say, it was one of the best training sessions I've ever had. it was one of those rare moments in life that you're surrounded by people that you actually really want to be with, doing exactly what you want to be doing and all around just having a good time. I don't throw this word around often, or at all really, but I truly feel blessed to have everyone at CP in my life. my life has changed so much for the better since I've been coming out to hudson and I love all of you for it.
thank you all for the best thanksgiving morning I could have ever imagined.

and not to be outdone by the gun show above, here's who really dominated CP yesterday.

oh and pete, I realize you're the vp and all, but you're not allowed to come next year since this is now tradition and your "flu" kept you away this year. hope everyone had a great holiday. see you all in the morning!

one of the reasons I hate scla

2008-11-17T21:02:00.004-05:00

it should go without saying that I dislike most of the trainers at scla but there's one particular girl who irritates the shit out of me. I have never once seen her train a client in a squat rack, though that goes for 95 % of the trainers there. this girl, and I have no idea what her name is because you know I'd call her out, trains specifically only on the smith machine and the cable machine. so tonight was no different, why should it be?? so I'm about to start doing my trap bar clusters and I set it up to warm up and here she comes with this really tall dude and she immediately goes to the smith machine. I happened to be set up in front of it so I moved down. this is me being nice and CONSIDERATE. something that is foreign to everyone in that fucking gym. she then has this tall dude do some move that involves his feet up on the stability ball thing and crunch his body up into like a V, I can't really explain it. but she has him do it RIGHT BESIDE MY TRAP BAR. this dudes head is literally right where the tb sticks out. so I wait for him to be done. but this move is way too hard for him to do and is taking him forever. so here's where I say fuck it. and continue on my training way. if this dude gets hit in the head with my trap bar, that's nobodies fault but his own for hiring a shithead trainer. needless to say, she moved. I'd like to believe she realized that the exercise was too advanced for him but that would mean she had an iota of common sense and I just doubt that's the case.
I hate that fucking gym.

three more things:
1: is there any kind of need for christmas music to be playing right now. I'm pretty sure I actually heard it playing as early as 11/1. fucking ridiculous. I don't want to say I hate christmas. but I really really don't like christmas. it's depressing to me. It makes me think of my nana and how she's not here anymore and that makes me depressed.
2: I'm changing my training hours at cp to coincide with the non-high school baseball players. looking at cute dudes will make the ridiculous things tony makes me do more enjoyable.
3: that bitch catherine not only didn't come out to cp on saturday, she's now ignoring my emails. bitch.
thats all. good night!

I swore I wouldn't do it again

2008-11-10T23:32:00.005-05:00

but I just booked my flight to d.c. for next week for ryan's second bootcamp graduation, with the family. my only consolation is that I'm flying there and back by myself. ryan is so proud of himself and what he's accomplished that I can't skip it. I also can't believe what I just spent on an hour and a half flight but I am not going to dwell on that right now.
what I will dwell on and talk about is my FAVORITE person at CP! this is her below. Oh how I love catherine. she's the only person who can call me a pussy for doing ghr's with a step and won't get punched. maybe if she actually shows up on saturdays I'd tell her in person.

yet another

2008-11-03T22:53:00.003-05:00

I have another funeral to go to at the end of the week sometime. on the left, standing up, is Kevin Hobart. he crashed his motorcycle friday night and died. he was 30 years old and while he was a fuck up in most ways imaginable, he was such good good kid at heart. he would give you the shirt off his back, granted it was probably someone else's shirt and he probably owed that person money for the shirt but he'd give it to you nonetheless. I'm gonna miss him.

the dating gods hate me

2008-10-27T15:39:00.001-04:00

I'm honestly not even gonna explain that title, just know it's true and I'm about to give up.
SO! as of right now, a total of 297 trojans (HA!), rootkits and spyware have been found and removed from my computer. thank the love of christ for my friend frankie, who is the one removing said crap from the computer. I promise not to steal anymore free music. and no, I'm not looking at porn online. though I might as well have been with all that shit on there. and he's not even done with the scan so more shit might be on there still. damn.
this morning I decided to drive into work for no other reason than I was running late and still needed to stop and get coffee. now I am your typical boston driver. I am a madwoman behind the wheel. the maine state police would agree with that statement too. anyways, the ride in was just another reminder of my hatred of scooters/mopeds. I HATE them. I want to run them all over. and they are everywhere these days. other than the fact that they're slow as shit, I hate when they cut through traffic. they should not be allowed to do it. if I'm stuck sitting in fucking traffic so should they. assholes.
I also really hate halloween. it's my least favorite day of the year. I hate dressing up and I don't want to on friday. but it's mandatory at work to dress up. I have said I hate halloween atleast 10 times a day for the past two weeks and I might incorporate into every sentence I say from now until friday. stupid fucking day.

hello cruel world

2008-10-26T13:05:00.002-04:00

have you all missed me? you may have been wondering where I've been or if the hate went away. no fear. I'm still here. I have a virus on my computer at home and can't get online to blog and I've had a lot to blog about. let's start with the virus. I don't know how I got it but it came from either my mom or my sister because we all got it. except their computers are fine now. I call mcafee like they did, can't get online so they can't help me. I get anti-virus software to fix it, can't use it because I can't get online. are you seeing the trend here. I'm about to throw the fucking computer out the fucking window. thankfully my friend frankie said he just went through the same hell a couple of weeks back and he's gonna try to help me. let's hope it works because I need to be able to get on the computer.

I hate luggage on wheels that everyone and their fucking mother has to take on the redline. it should be like bikes, they shouldn't be allowed on the train in rush hour time. that's what fucking cabs are for bitches. I take the train to and from south station, which is where the silver line to the airport is. so there's always people and their fucking luggage and they're like people with baby carriages, thinking they have the right of way and taking up all the space and being slow. get the fuck out of the way assholes.

ok, I gotta get off jason's computer and pay his bills. and possibly get another tattoo.

and can matt cassel just throw the fucking ball man. I miss tb

it's a sad world we live in

2008-10-10T08:21:00.002-04:00

http://www.bostonmagazine.com/articles/sweating_with_the_sharks/page1

steph told me about this article and it's so spot on. I honestly can't believe this is where I train. the only consolation is that I do not belong to any of those groups they are describing. which may just make me a sad pathetic person in general, but I'm not there for that bullshit, I'm there to train. and yes, I do have a big crush on one of the dudes that goes there. but I haven't talked to him and don't plan on it.
my heads going to explode with a sinus/tooth infection so I'm going back to bed. I'll blog more later

fuck manny ramirez

2008-10-06T23:33:00.001-04:00

I didn't like him when he was here. I don't like him even more now that he's not and wants to talk shit. go bay! that's all I gotta say

I am a rockstar

2008-10-02T22:22:00.002-04:00

because... I have a video on tony's blog. I'd hyperlink it, but the only people who read this blog know tony too, so I'm sure it's no surprise. and I dont' know how to hyperlink. I made those lunges look easy bitches, but they weren't. the video makes it look like I should have added more weight, but that shit was hard. anyways, my mom thinks tony's funny. I do not think tony's funny. let me explain. so for the past two nights I've trained at scla I forgot my program at home. and those who know the story of the douche at scla who wouldn't help me out the last time I forgot my program, knows that I was pissed with myself for forgetting it. and yea, I forgot it twice. but god dammit if I was gonna go home and not train. so I call my mom to log onto my email. after about 15 minutes of her trying to figure out how to download the program she starts reading me off week three's training. Box Squats 5x2. and in the comments DON'T BE A PUSSY. which my mom reads off and proceeds to crack up laughing. for like five minutes. real cute tony. real fucking cute. jerk. and you know what? I wasn't a pussy. for not having a spot and doing them at stupid scla and not cp, where I somehow become she-ra, I squatted pretty heavy. I'm sure not heavy in your eyes, but in mine it was pretty heavy. not tina kim heavy. but michelle heavy. so there.

p.s. I hate cottage cheese. I'm gonna dedicate a whole blog to how much I hate hate hate cottage cheese. but I need to go to bed. so look for it on saturday, which is when I have to eat it again. fucking cottage cheese

thug life

2008-10-01T00:15:00.001-04:00

if you haven't seen pineapple express, you must go out right now and see it. at the very least rent it immediately when it comes out on dvd. I'd let you borrow my copy that I am going to buy, but I'll be busy watching it.

my baking days are over

2008-09-23T23:01:00.003-04:00

for those of you who don't know, I moved about a month ago. into my own apartment. after five years of living with three plus other people it was time to go and I got a sweet deal on a one bedroom apartment in east cambridge. or what I thought was a sweet deal. because of course there's always gotta be a catch. like the two fucking maniac children that live upstairs from me. that I swear as soon as the sun rises they leap out of their beds and then proceed to play tag throughout the apartment until their bedtime. every goddamn day. seven days a week. sleep in? I don't think so. I'm pretty sure their parents get in on the game of tag as well, because you know, four year olds can't possibly weigh that much for it to sound like elephants are coming through my ceiling. and if anyone has ever wondered where I get my attitude from, my mom was here last week and said she was gonna go upstairs and punch the mother in the mouth for letting her kids run around like that. apple doesn't fall far from the tree people.
ok, kids aside my real issue is that my oven is from the 1950's. I'm not lying. I googled it. and lord knows google doesn't lie. 1950's bitches! it has a heater on one side and the oven on the other. the stovetop lights when it wants to and it takes a good 30 minutes to pre-heat. seriously? yea, seriously. so I thought I'd change things up and eat healthy tonight. so I'm cooking some chicken for my salad. cooking it for a fucking hour! I just got done eating at 10:30 because it took that long to cook a piece of goddamn chicken. serves me right.
my real issue though is my baking. I bake like it's my job. hell, it should be my job. I am a kickass baker. I put kickass cupcakes to shame. not petsi's though. that lady is a baking genius and I want to be her! (if you aren't aware of petsi pies, I suggest going there. PHENOMENAL!)
so if it takes an hour to cook chicken imagine how long it will take to cook cupcakes and breads and cookies. this is a sad sad world we live in when I can't bake. I don't even eat the baked goods I make, I share. I'm a good sharer. so everyone better find a new baker cuz no more whoopie pies for you. I will cry now. good night.

silver lining

2008-09-19T01:22:00.002-04:00

by rilo kiley is what I'm listening to right now (I'm taking a cue from steph's blog right now).

and my hero is Nancy LeBlanc, who not only got her locksmith friend to make me a key that actually WORKS for my car, she drove it down to redbones this afternoon (technically yesterday afternoon). and I can't even convey my appreciation to her. thank you thank you thank you Nancy.

so every once in a while life works in your favor and I'm so happy today was my day.

random acts of stupidity

2008-09-16T23:09:00.006-04:00

before I sully up my trip to chicago with alot of hate I just want to say that it was so great to see my brother. he looks so good. he dropped 20 pounds and the navy haircut wasn't as bad as I was expecting and it actually makes him look both younger and older at the same time. don't ask me to explain that, it just is that way. that's a picture of him and his girlfriend, who I love and was my saving grace on this trip.

that being said... sweet jesus up above I don't know how I survived that trip. honestly, I think I took atleast ten years off my life from the shear aggrivation of just everyone and everything about my trip. traveling with family does not suit me. my dad made me crazy. I feel bad even saying that because he's sick and has no short term memory and is like an alzheimers patient at the age of 51 but man, I thought I was gonna throw myself in front of all the god forsaken traffic in chicago. right off the bat there's a family fight in the airport because my dad wants breakfast and we dont' have time to stop. he has a thing about having bacon and eggs everyday and if he doesn't get it he's pissed. like locking my mom out of the house pissed. so because we don't have time to stop for goddamn bacon and eggs, we're all assholes. so we get to chicago and by that point we're all starving. I'm pretty sure the people of Zion, IL only eat mcdonalds and burger king because other than that, the choices for food were pretty goddamn slim.

and guess what else they don't have in that neck of the woods of IL? foam rollers! I made a hasty retreat to the gym the first night and I dont' know if it was my accent or they're really stupid, but the dude at golds gym looked at me like I had seven heads when I asked if they had foam rollers. he even asked the manager, she was a cute one, she didn't know what they were either. and I was too aggrivated to explain it.

I'm not gonna bore you with the rest of the details of my trip, just know that there's also no ice coffee in the city of zion and we did some touristy stuff in chicago. which is a city I definitly need to go back to without the family.

now the real hate. NORTHWEST FUCKING AIRLINES BLOWS. and so does Avis rental car for that matter. we flew back to boston on sunday morning at 7 am. which meant we left the hotel at 4:30 to get to the airport and to return our rental car. this bitch at avis tells me I didn't go through the right process to return the car, so I get back in the fucking car and drive literally 50 feet to the check in for them to tell me to go back to the lady and get my receipt. really? was it honestly necessary for me to do all that? and in the process miss the bus back to the airport. fine. fine fine fine. I go back to the lady who then tells me I didn't go to the right guy. that's when I started swearing and that's when she promptly took the keys and gave me my receipt. I then get accosted by some lady's perfume. IT'S 5:30 IN THE MORNING. who are you trying to impress with all the fucking perfume? I had to move away from her because I instantly got a headache. ok, we get on the flight to detroit, because of course we have a layover, total turbulance the whole 47 minutes. poor jenny hates flying and cried and held my hand the whole way. (I can be nice when I want to) we connect to the boston flight, everythings fine. UNTIL my baggage comes through. upside down. soaking wet. the pocket zipper wide open. contents GONE. what contents you ask? all my mac makeup. jenny's keys. and my only fucking house and car key. GONE. did I mention they were my only keys. yes wiseasses of the world I realize I'm the asshole for not ever making a copy of said keys but really I don't need that thrown in my face right now. I go to the baggage issue people and report my problem and they have nothing to offer me. they called someone, who knows who, but they didn't have my keys. shocking, I know. luckily my landlord had an extra set of house keys, because honestly if I had to go home with my parents I wouldn't be alive to write this right now.

and that in a nutshell sums up my whole trip and really my life in general. I am stupid. I do stupid things and now I have no car. I have no car to get to cp on saturday. I have no car to get to my waxing appointment tomorrow. I have no car to get to my dentist appointment on saturday. I guess the one upside of this all is that I also have no car to get to jason's to do his bookkeeping and no car to get to visit the family this weekend.

random thursday thoughts

2008-09-11T06:42:00.003-04:00

I'm about to head to the airport to go to my brothers navy graduation in Illinois so I wanted to leave some love for you all before I go. and by love I really mean random hate.

why do people order water with no ice in a restaurant? I mean I have sensitive teeth too but not so much that ice in my water is going to kill me. I literally had one kid tell me he was allergic to ice. he thought he was being funny. he got the michelle look. he stopped thinking he was funny right away. jackass.
and this is why I'm a terrible waitress. Ihate stupid shit. you know right off the bat what you're gonna be dealing with for the rest of the night when someone orders water with no ice. assholes. those who know me, know that if I don't like you, you know it IMMEDIATELY. there's nothing fake about me, I can't hide my feelings. sometimes people appreciate that about me, but for the most part its lost on everyone. and you would think that as much as I hate people, I'd hate waiting on them. but I actually like waiting tables. or I should say, in the right setting I like doing it. I don't think cambridge is the right setting for me. too many uppity bitches.

I thought I had more hate to spread today, but I'm drawing a blank. I haven't had my coffee yet, that might be it. I'm sure I'll have plenty more to blog about when I get back from chicago.

but before I go I wanted to say Congratulations to Brian on getting engaged. I realized after I left CP on saturday that I didn't even mention it to him and I felt like an ass. so yea, good luck buddy. having a girlfriend in connecticut's not the same as living with them in the same house forever, but who am I to talk with my perpetual singleness?
seriously, I'm really happy for you and the mystery woman.

and thank you to tony and eric who I kept at CP until 8:30 last night while I trained. though I do believe tony is trying to kill me with this program. here's two of the medley's he wants me to do

Medley: Bike (30 sec), DB Push Press (10), Clap Push-Ups (5), Jump Squats (10), Elbow Touch Plank (5 per).
Medley: 1-Arm Farmers Walks, Recoiled Med Ball Throws, Burpees, Keg Press, Sled Push

the first medley is supposed to take place at SCLA. and why he thinks I can do clap push ups is beyond my comprehension. and keg presses? really I'd like to press the keg into his face.

and lastly, Pete, Catherine and Steph all love Ryan Montbleau! and I love you three!!

ahh, what a refreshing way to end a blog. with some love. I hope chicago's ready for some hate because you know the love ain't gonna last long
don't miss me too much!!!

why you'll always be fat

2008-09-03T21:06:00.003-04:00

I work in boston, in a not so many floored building and what drives me the most crazy is the bitches who take the elevator to the first and second floor. it's always the fatties too. honest to god people, do you realize that if you can't atleast climb the stairs for a floor or two you'll always be fat?? christ. I realize I should be climbing the stairs too, but five flights first thing in the morning is a bit much. I'm usually lugging a heavy ass bag on my back and carrying two ice coffees, so going up five floors isn't my ideal way to start the day.

so you may have noticed I haven't updated this in a bit, but I've been away in maine. where the saying is: Maine, the way life should be. and I agree. goddamnit if I don't love maine. I'm not sure if I'd ever live there, but my friends house in on a 2o mile lake and you do nothing but eat, drink and be merry. yes, this girl here was in fact merry. for days on end. the only thing that pissed me off all weekend was my friends dog barking, and then I just put my ipod on and went on being merry. maybe I should live in maine...

side note, tonight at 6:30 there had to be atleast 50 people on the weight floor, I was not one of them because I just got out of a spin class, but the only girl there was donning a set of pink dumbbells. ok, I think they were blue, but you get my point. it's a sad state of affairs that we live in today....

AND tony and eric won't be at cp this weekend, so either I skip cp, which will mean three weeks not there or I skip my 4th week of the program and not do my 1 RM of trap bar deadlifts. because honestly, if they aren't there to witness my awesomeness, does it really even happen?

shit, you know it does! but it's always better when tony witnesses it. eric I'm sure notices my awesomeness all the time

what the fuck?

2008-08-22T19:35:00.002-04:00

I have a partner for smelly hand dude. his name is smelly ass dude. he frequents magoun saloon in somerville and looks like michael bolton. not even joking here. anyways this dude will be sitting at the bar and will just let one rip. he usually does it when the door opens so the breeze will blow his stink throughout the bar. again, not even remotelyjoking. this guy is so foul it's amazing to me someone hasn't knocked him out. it's a known fact that the shitty smell is coming from this dude and nothing ever has been done. the owner, I believe, has spoken to him about it but he still persists in funking up the joint and the owner says he can't kick him out for that reason alone. why the fuck not? what good is it to own your own damn bar if you can't kick people out. I'm usually too busy gagging to do anything about it. but I am also not getting that close to him to actually say anything, let alone punch him. it might almost be worth it to throw up on him though. how great would that be?

what the fuck is wrong with people???

2008-08-20T17:18:00.004-04:00

I witnessed the grossest thing ever this morning at the gym, I literally had to clamp my hand over my mouth so I wouldn't spit my surge all over the place.first off, at 7:00 this morning, I was the only girl on the weight floor without a trainer. and all (three) of the women that were with trainers were on some form of cable machine. the whole time. so sad...ok, so I'm going about my program and of course because I have to do chest supported rows, suddenly all of scla has to do csr's. I normally never see anyone using this equipment and now it's all the rage! I'm sure people use it regularly and I just don't notice it because I'm not doing those at the time, but whatever. I needed the equipment and it's being hogged by some skinny dude, so I'm annoyed. so this skinny dude in his running shorts, you know the ones - mega short - gets off the csr machine and is walking about doing ridiculous stretches. I sit up from doing a db press and notice him in the mirror, with his hand completely down his shorts, rummaging around for all the world to see. and don't tell me about adjusting guys because I don't want to hear it. he then takes his hand out of his shorts and sniffs his hand. I shit you not. as I said above, I had a mouthful of surge at the time and it almost went everywhere. I then proceeded to crack up laughing. because that's what I do in ridiculous situations. smelly hand dude then proceeded to go around and touch just about every set of db's. and that's when I said to myself, I'm outta here. and here I am now, with the image stuck in my head of this retard smelling his nasty ass hand. seriously? what the hell is wrong with people?

as an aside, has anyone ever checked this out? http://evilbeetgossip.film.com/
so friggin funny. yes, it's about celebrities but it's hysterical. reminds me of me. she's a serious hater too. and she loves michael phelps. just like me! maybe we are twins separated at birth!check it out

I rock

2008-08-13T23:09:00.004-04:00

just a short one tonight because I can honestly say that I'm too goddamn tired to hate right now. just wanted to let you all know that last night I did a 175 lb trap bar deadlift for 3 reps and this morning did a 90 lb bench press for 2 sets of 2 reps. you all may not think that's alot, but it's the heaviest I've ever done. so I'm pretty happy with myself.
oh, and stolen from healthworks tonight, Gravity Pilates class description: Looking for that lean and tone look without bulking up? that's all I'm gonna write on it because I know when tony reads this his head is gonna explode. I'll bring the paper with me on saturday though so tony can blog about it himself. ahh, good times.
I totally lied about being too tired to hate (you all know that wasn't true anyways). I hate taking flameout. the pills are huge and they are now stuck in my throat.
BUT I do love michael phelps. I dont' give a shit that he's 23 years old. he's adorable and has a hot ass body.
and I'm going to bed now with that though. toodles

omri and random hate thoughts

2008-08-12T23:12:00.005-04:00

I'll get to omri in a minute, first off the weirdo guy that does db curls on the spin bike was at it again tonight. and to make it worse, he's in spandex shorts and a tank top. it wasn't a pretty site. both the outfit and the ridiculous curls he was doing on the bike. he then shows up in the weight area to do some "benching" on the smith machine, and the whole time he had his legs up in the air against the mirrors. really dude? bad enough you're using the smith machine, but now you're gonna put your feet up against the mirrors? such an asshole. and then his friend - dreadlocked white guy, also in spandex comes over to talk to him. whatever no big deal. except he's basically standing on top of me while I'm doing speed trap bar deadlifts. I just kept on doing what I was doing and didn't care if I hit him or not. he moved.
I would have totally appreciated the trainer asking me if I was using the cable machine tonight. if I wasn't holding db's in the air doing reverse lunges on the slide board. does it look like I'm using the damn cable machine. I guess the thought was there but really dude, how about you wait until I'm done doing my lunges? I think he just wanted to talk to me.
I was on the train tonight and got stuck beside this obnoxious woman who kept reassuring her fat daughter that marilyn monroe was a "perfect" size 13. when the fuck did a size 13 become perfect?? I thought the saying was a perfect size 6 or 8 or something like that?
which now leads me to omri. I have honestly met omri once. he seems like a nice little guy. I really don't have a problem with him. why would I? I've only met him once and I don't train with him. what I am beginning to get a little bonkers over is his comments in various blogs/forums. here are a few:
"I love the Cheesecake Factory– the familiar menu, the never-changing “specials,” the ginormous portions… You go in knowing what you plan on getting, you get it, you leave. Plus anyone who tells me the avocado egg rolls are bad (i dont care if they’re bad FOR you– I just need calories anyway) is a liar and is going straight to hell for it."
"I only started putting on the weight when Brian got me to scarf down every calorie i could find– bagels and all. So a high carb diet might be appropriate for me, whereas it might make another person fat and slow"

ok, I thought I had more of omri rubbing it in our faces that he NEEDS to put on weight, but I can't find anymore. anyways, really omri? do you need to gain weight? is that what you're trying to tell us? maybe I just read the comments too many times, or I'm just a fatty and am jealous but dude we get it. you're skinny and we're not. you can do freaky wall slide things in ec's article and we can't, you are great, we suck. hooray for you! not stop telling us how skinny you are for the love of christ. it's pissing me off. otherwise I don't have a problem with you.

seriously???

2008-08-06T23:12:00.002-04:00

ec sent me this link today. I'm warning you before you click on it, it will fill you with such intense hatred, you will know what it's like to be me everyday.

http://www.netrition.com/cgi/newsprint.cgi?file=20080805115400_1

ok, now that you've read it. really.??? you're too fat to be executed? what else do you have to do in jail than workout? I mean, I've never been in jail, but I know peeps who have and there's nothing for you to do! and I know prison food isn't good. how are you so fat?? now I do know that you can like order snacks and all from the canteen, but really, how many snacks do you have to eat to be so grossly obese that it would be difficult to execute you?
and not to mention, who are his attorneys? their job really is to get a convicted rapist off death row by saying he's too grossly obese to be executed. give me a fucking break. these people have to just hate themselves. because if I was an attorney and this was my job, I'd just throw in the towel on life and call it a day.
I swear to god I've heard it all now.

spike bandwagon

2008-08-05T23:42:00.003-04:00

I just read tony's new post on the t-nation forum and think that between me and him we could get serious commissions for talking up spike. oh, that's right. like 5 people read my blog.... whatevs.

oh how I love spike

2008-08-05T22:53:00.003-04:00

I know I'm just saying what everyone already knows and thinks, but I love spike. today was my first spike in 16 days. 16 DAYS!!! how I missed it. and what I'm about to say is probably gonna make all of CP angry. but I also have lifted a weight in 16 days (which is why I also haven't written much, in case you all missed me and my hate). I have my reasons but they're just gonna come across as excuses so I'm not even gonna get into why I have been a slacker, but how I've missed training! so I drink my spike on my way to the gym and I immediately feel it and I know it's gonna be a good training day. first off, I was sweating before I even lifted a weight and first thing I do (after extensive warming up) is speed trap bar dead lifts. these might be my new favorite thing. I'm sure I was getting some looks doing them. and then I was really sweating. you all know how I sweat. it wasn't pretty. I'm thinking, even though tony said even he wouldn't do my insano program, I'm liking it. until I get to side planks with rows. never mind that they're ridiculously hard, but of course the two cable machines are being hogged by trainers. so one opens up, I do one set. then a dude takes the machine. fine, I'll ask if I can work in. can't do that, because he's too busy having a 15 minute conversation with someone else. I timed it. 15 minutes. no lie. he did one set in that whole time. so now I'm just too pissed to ask him to work in because I know I'm gonna say something like, since you're just standing here talking, mind if I actually do some work? and then I was even more pissed because I was really so happy to be back training. really I was. happy. me. just to be back training. (what have you turned me into tony?) and this dude was ruining it! AND THEN this other dude tried to steal my cable machine WHILE I WAS ON IT! no joke. I'm done on the ground, about to get into plank position and he goes to move the other arm and change the weight. so I say uh, hi, I'm still using this. I'm a big girl people. how do you miss someone on the ground in front of the damn machine? honest to god.
anyways, I finished the stupid planks and went on to stupid front loaded plate squats, or whatever the hell they're called. hard is what I call them. my legs are like jello. imagine if I didn't have the spike? I'd probably be dead. well probably not, because I rock but still...
btw, is anyone from t-nation reading this shit? I LOVE SPIKE. SEND ME SPIKE! only red though, the other kinds are gross.

and because it wouldn't be me without saying something mean... this morning I'm walking to the train station and there's this couple in front of me and they are homely as shit. I mean I guess ugly people need love too, but do we have to witness it? thank christ I'm not ugly.

I hate tony

2008-08-01T01:56:00.003-04:00

really tony, 11:56 on my birthday and you decide to place a post saying happy birthday. don't think I didn't catch the sarcasm about being your favorite client ever either, because if I was, you would have texted or called or emailed or posted a happy birthday to me before 4 mintutes left in the goddamn day. the only people I like in all of CP right now are the girls and eric. thank you for the birthday wishes, I truly appreciate it.

tony, be expecting a punch in the throat.

I am stupid

2008-07-30T08:18:00.002-04:00

I mean that pretty much goes without saying but while in maine this past weekend I thought I was some kind of daredevil and decided to try out the rope swing on horseshoe lake. and like my mother said, michelle you're not a kid anymore only kids go on rope swings, well the rope swing fucked me up! from what I've been told, because you know alcohol was involved in this decision, I slid down the rope swing instead of letting go, hitting every knot on the rope. I have two purple fingers and a green pinkie. they're not broke but they might as well be because this means I can't hold a goddamn weight in either hand. typing this is killing me. everytime I hit the enter or shift key I get shock through my right hand. I am some kind of piece of work.

two words

2008-07-25T07:59:00.001-04:00

size matters

random hate

2008-07-18T19:23:00.004-04:00

thought I'd jump on the random friday thoughts, but of course mine is going to be random hates in no particular order:

-people who get on the train before the people who need to get off actually get off the train. what the fuck people! the train is going nowhere until the people are off and you are on, what kind of rush are you in that you need to plow past everyone, just to get on? where are you going that's so important. maybe I need to go there too to see how great it is. I know for goddamn sure nobody is that excited to get to work in the morning, so calm the fuck down.

-skinny ass bitches weighing themselves at the gym. I'm not even gonna bitch about it, that line says it all.

-tony's new program for me. are you fucking serious tony??? what have I done in the past to lead you to believe I can do 80 pushups? I'm gonna be at the gym all goddamn night on that day.

-to the fat chick who works in the office at my gym, this is why i hate you: you are a fat bitch. everytime I see her I actually smile. because she's fat and I'm not. how in gods good name do you stay that fat working at a gym? when I worked there I was working out every goddamn day. if for no other reason than I hated my job and I needed to get away from my desk. but still, I was making an effort.

-the hot dude that I have a big crush on at scla. yes, I am that girl in this situation. I don't hate him so he shouldn't be on this list but he was in a suit and tie and glasses on the elevator and thats really all I can think of right now, so that's why he's here

-my asshole downstairs neighbor who doesn't have the balls to come out and say something to me about not closing the gate behind me when I come into the yard. I mean if I were her, I wouldn't have the balls to say anything to me either, but I'm just stating she's a pussy.

-per suggestion I am deleting this line. but just know that I hate loud typers and talkers

-pete who told me I suck earlier in the week. don't like you right now and you are not getting cupcakes tomorrow.

-my boss at emma's. who's just an ass and pissed me off last night.

ok, that's it for now. I have a date I gotta get ready for and need to de-hate so I don't scare him away.

hate free

2008-07-15T22:44:00.005-04:00

is the way I be tonight. shocking, I know. but in six days my brother leaves for boot camp for the navy. and I can honestly say that I am heartbroken. I think in the long run that it will be the best thing for him. but right now I just can't get past the fact that my little brother is leaving us, for a long time. so instead of being angry, I'm just sad.

not one, but two

2008-07-15T01:02:00.002-04:00

fucking benches stolen on me tonight at scla. fine, I can understand the first one, I only had my weights next to it, nothing else, but the second one I specifically asked this dude if he was using it and the weights that I was using to begin with. no he says. so I do my set of neutral grip incline db presses. I go to do my pull ups and next thing I know, the fucking dude's buddy is on my bench. common courtesy says that the guy I asked if he was using it should have told his friend that I was. oh, silly me, we're at scla. forgot for a minute. I understand how the gym works, if you walk away from a machine, it's free game. but this was not the only bench around! maybe I am asking too much for someone to have the courtesy to say someone's using that. dickhead.
and there was a girl doing db shoulder presses (pretty sure that's what they're called) while on the stationary bike. what is going on in the world that this stuff is acceptable.

why?

2008-07-10T23:29:00.003-04:00

this is going to be short and obviously not so sweet.
I've been noticing this guy on one of the spin bikes (not in class tony) riding along, but while doing so, also hold like 20 pound dumbells doing something like flys while he's pedaling. it's not exactly flys, it looks like he's doing the no money drill but with dumbells. why is he doing this? it hurts my head to see him doing it. in any case, he looks like an asshole and as I walked by him tonight I just shook my head at him. which if you know the story with me, that's almost the worst thing you can do to me, call me whatever name you want, but shake your head in disgust and that might be the last time your head shakes like that. and trust me CP staff, you do it on saturday, I will hurt all of you. I can bet brian will be the only one to even try it, knowing he's my "fav" and thinking I won't hurt him. I'll still punch him, don't worry

pregnant people make me nauseous

2008-07-10T00:30:00.002-04:00

this is probably the only time I'm going to apologize for my personal views, mostly because I know some of my readers have kids, so I'm sorry for the forthcoming rant. but really, pregnant people make me nauseous. I have known since I've been ten that I dont' want kids. I don't understand why anyone wants children honestly. they grow up to be fuckers. this all stems from a lady at the gym last night who not only was wearing big ass sunglasses in the weight area, who not only had on flip flops, who not only was doing some ridiculous move with 5 lb dumbells, but was doing all this wearing a tight ass tank top and was atleast 8 months pregnant. I'd almost forgive all the ridiculous shit she was doing if she just had a normal t-shirt on, but no a tank top was what she felt like wearing. if I was a normal, child loving person I'd say, yay for you! you're pregnant! but I'd still say, put some fucking clothes on. because nobody wants to see that shit.
again, sorry to all the children loving/having people. dont' mean to offend you guys, because I actually like you. the rest of the world, I hate.

crackheads, crutches and cockroaches

2008-07-02T22:59:00.004-04:00

yea, I said cockroaches bitches! no lie, I leave the gym tonight and get on the redline at park street and see this guy in front of my hop to the right so I look down and there's a cockroach the length of my palm scurrying along the ground. no shit. I'm so not girly but I HATE bugs. so I immediately screech like a little girl and run for my life. I'm still fucking itchy and freaked out. I'm going to be having dreams about that fucker tonight. christ.

I'm totally going backwards here. so before I get on the redline I have to walk through boston common, which is crackhead central. there's a c.h. chick walking towards me muttering about how she's going to snap. so I steer clear of her and right behind her I find out why she's going to snap. another c.h. whining, but why didn't you tell me donna. over and over again. and then the bitch ended up at the harvard stop with me. I don't know how that happened because she wasn't moving fast enough to get to the train in time. I am cursed I tell you.
I hate crackheads. sweet baby jesus do I hate crackheads.

so yea, there were two guys on crutches at the gym tonight. I've never seen anyone on crutches at the gym. ever. normally I'd say wow, they're really dedicated to their training. but this ain't cressey performance people. this is scla. and they're just assholes for being at the gym on crutches. I think someone's looking for some sympathy. and I don't have any for them

totally unrelated, but all is forgiven eric for not putting me on the powerpoint on sunday, if only because you said I was the wind beneath your wings and I personally know that cp wouldn't be the same without me. so, you know, no special thanks needed...
and pete, don't hate. because I can already hear you bitching that I let eric off too easily.

have a happy 4th everyone!!

2008-06-29T11:09:00.001-04:00

tony gave me homework yesterday, which was to start this blog and normally I'd tell him to screw but I have some time before the big 21st century nutrition and exercise for women seminar so I thought I'd jot down some random thoughts for today.

first, if someone's having a seizure in the gym, for the love of christ people, give her space and don't gawk at her. go about your business. if that was you, would you want to be stared at? I doubt it.
second, you why can't you use chalk in the gym? are you really worried about the mess chalk is going to make. that's fucking ridiculous.

mostly this blog is going to be me ranting about sports club la. because the people who go there are idiots as are most of the trainers. and yes, I could go to another gym, but I'm pretty sure I'd find the same shit happening everywhere. and for those that say well if you don't like it don't go. you obviously don't lift weights like I do and need to be punched in the throat. and I'm the girl to do it